Friday, December 14, 2012 it?

Ok, lets have a reality check here.

In 3 simple words, “I am Lost.”

I haven’t socialized for almost over 5 months. Haven’t given myself a treat, ok ok, a mega-treat for a really long time. It feels like I kissed a girl last in 1826 (that is not true). I haven’t had a Subway Melt in over a decade. And to add to all this mess, I haven’t written since…’Maybe Maybe’ that surfaced on June the 21st 2012.

I have these long durations often, when I do not write, and every time I try to come up with an excuse, but the truth is there isn’t any excuse other than simply put in a single word, ‘time’. Now you shall say, ‘Seriously Dude, Time? Time nahi hai tere paas? Are you kidding me?’ Well, the answer to that isn’t quite straight. ‘Yes, I am not as busy that I can’t find time to write. But writing sometimes, most of the times, requires, how do I put it, ‘limitless leisure’.

The time to listen to the breeze blow by. The time to watch the pigeons make out on the window sill. The time to just keep gazing at the fan overhead, and that too when it isn't even on. The time to count rice while eating. The time to walk backwards all throughout the house. The time to make 10 different poses before combing your hair after a shower. The time to do a mo-hawk every time you shampoo, make a duckface, sing like a pig and dance like Elvis. The time to go to the terrace of your building and count the number of aunties around your house who are in your ‘Das saal choti se lekar bees saal badi tak koi bhi chalegi’ category.

Ab utna time to nahi hai. Hota, to likhne ko, Insah Allah, bohot kuch hota. Par hai nahi. So we gotta find a different way to manage time, because, mano ya na mano, I, simply, cannot stop writing entirely. It like Bhui Sir’s ‘Bread and Butter’. I have to write.

So here it is, making a promise (Haah!). I will write, more often.

And in Ratan Tata’s words, “A Promise, is after all, a Promise.”

Till next then.

Peace out.


Thursday, June 21, 2012


Most of my posts are triggered by some or the other thing/incident I come across in life. Almost all of them are based on what happen to me, and what I do about them. I generally have a reaction only to events of massive proportions. I need to let them out of my system, and that is the main reason I let them out, because if I don’t, I can not be at peace with myself. On those days, I do not sit to think what to write, because that thought has already taken root in my mind long time ago, whenever what happened, happened.

But today, I feel different. I find it difficult to express, really. I do not feel the need to blog, because nothing of that sort has happened with me, today, or in near past, for that matter. I do not feel agitated about anything worth mentioning that has happened to me in recent times, or so I think, and maybe, feel. Today, I feel free. Away from all chaos in life. I am sitting here, thinking what to blog about, actually. Do I write about the rain, that is yet to come? Or the strong wind outside? Do I mention the heavy Desi dinner I had today, or that my prof. has asked for a treat and a good chat, and I am very much looking forward to it? Or that a couple of my lady profs wanna go out on a date with me? (Or so they said! Winking smile )

Its 04:20 in the morning, and I am wide awake, no pressure of any deadlines, or exams, no tension even. My fingers are urging me to write, but my mind is lazy. It isn’t in an agitated state, maybe that is why its giving me no signals, or suggestions. But I will write. I want to. Not need to. Want to.

Today all somehow feels quiet. Serene. Or maybe this is the quiet before the coming storm. Maybe this is the still before the menacing pace of life ahead. Maybe! In that case, I better gear-up for the same. Will start with a couple of hours’ sleep.

Till Next then.

Saturday, June 16, 2012

Harmony & Disharmony

For those that define Harmony as the natural state of existence, or a state that we should aspire to, I have a question:

Does the Universe not exist in constant battle between contradictory forces of Harmony and Disharmony? Like the sunspots of the Sun, the Universe too tends to explode out of itself and then is pulled back by a contradictory force?

Would the Universe and everything that existed in it not be completely dead and non creative if there was a continuous stable non moving state of Harmony? And the same would go for us, in any form you may decide to see ourselves. Our consciousness, our soul, or our ‘five senses self’. The one law of creativity, of existence, of consciousness, of life itself, all that exists, or potentially exists, does so between extreme contradictions.

After all, Good can only be described in the context of Evil and vice versa. So what is that state that is one of complete acceptance (oops – here we go again in that word) which is neither good nor evil, nor moral or immoral, nor active or inactive, that is neither violent nor non-violent ? That has form but no recognizable form? A state that defies all adjectives, nouns or verbs we can think of, a state that exists without context with anything else, that is complete within itself yet completely infinite and incomplete?

For those that claim to have found that state which is often described as 'nirvana' (Hinduism) , or 'shunyata' (Buddhism) , or the eternal life (Islam and Christianity), I assume have encompassed the forces of contradiction and disharmony within themselves, battling neither, so experience themselves as the Universe and Eternity themselves. They are neither one nor the other, but part of a stillness that allows the battle to rage within. Knowing it to be an eternal battle, but able to smile upon it.

For me, I am still part of the battle, but learning that being buffeted by contradiction and giving into the contradictory forces is just the first step – the step that gives into the unknown without resistance. Or atleast active resistance, for the mind and the ego still rebels. The first step is to accept Chaos as the natural order of things, before reaching and yearning for that which is called 'enlightenment' or inner stillness, or whatever word and religion or philosophy chooses to use.

So forgive me if I question those that seem to emphatically KNOW. I don’t. I yearn to experience, and wonder at people that say they know. Is it mere knowledge? Or is it experience? Is it intellectual or is it emotional? The only people I meet that seem to be completely comfortable with contradiction (or duality as it is commonly called) are children , who have not yet been taught to separate completely that which is imagined and that which sensed.

I see everything I write here as huge question mark. A search and questioning, and sharing that yearning with others.

Till Next then

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Thanks to you, my friend.!

There are days that I wish to empty myself.

Empty myself of everything.

Of all the clutter that distorts.


So I can make room to breathe.

So I can make room to imagine.

So I can make room to love.

So I can make room to forgive.

So I can make room to listen,


To listen to you that is.



to your worries,

to your fears,

to your aspirations,

to your hopes,

to your dreams,

to your passions.


That way, I have little to do but be still,

be silent,

be kind,

be empathetic,

as I listen to you.


And in understanding you,

I become me again,

I become hopeful,

I become gentle,

I become uncluttered,

I become quiet.


For your wishes

are like mine.


For your dreams

are like mine.


For your fears

are like mine.


And as I bid farewell to you

My hesitations are silenced.

I no longer wish to be empty.

Rather, I want to be drenched,

saturated even,

in the beauty of life.


Thanks to you, my friend.!

Thursday, April 26, 2012


Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul

--William Ernest Henley

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Autopsy of Love: A Story

Love is an illusion. ‘May be’. Love is the most beautiful feeling ever experienced by humans. ‘May be’. Love is an over-rated emotion. ‘May be’. Love has the power to destroy not only one’s life but the whole world around you. ‘Well…May be'.
I never disagree with any definition for love. People have their own theories and versions for love. Even I have my own. One could prophesize any philosophy about love but if one-sided love prolonged for many years, you can relate to every known definition of ‘love’. My love story was not a very different one.
We were friends when we were kids. In adolescence, I developed some ‘special’ emotions in the friendship. I didn’t figure out it was love until my friends convinced me that it was love. Moreover, there were stuff like cinema, novels etc. that compel you to believe in the thing called ‘Love’. And from here I started my version of love.
Story becomes more clich├ęd as it progressed. She never had this notion of ‘love’ for a friend like me. With time, I tried everything to express my love. My innumerable banal poetries, songs had proved that I was a matter of fun in the school. We were no longer friends now. And one day, I came to know that she had an affair with our captain of basket ball team. I felt heart-broken but blissfully, when you were teen, there are other distractions than love in life, called ‘Studies’.
So, I studied hard and thought may be, I could marry her if I become a rich man. But, then in my final years, I heard that she was getting married. I gave my final shot and called her that if she could accept my love and reject the other marriage proposal for her. She told me, it was a love marriage.
“What are you thinking??Why are you worried now??….we had accepted your decision of marriage.”
My mother just broke my thought process, the thoughts of my immortal love story and dragged me to the present.
“Mummy, I am not worried. Just give me a moment of silence.”
So, I believe, we were at ‘Ouch..!!’. With it there was one more emotion ‘Enough of this propaganda of love, now I refuse to exist as a loser in real life.’ I had gone for further studies. I had no news about her. Then I met Trisha. She was a nice and intelligent girl. We enjoyed each other’s company. I started believing in mature love stories, a love where you could analyze the pro and cons of everything. A love whether you could envision the point ‘and they lived happily ever after’ based on your logic and statistics.
So, we fall in love. Her parents had no objection from marriage. Now, I went home to cajole my parents to the idea of ‘Trisha’ as their daughter in law. I could see the future in front of my eyes. Then one day, I went to my friend’s wedding and I met ‘Deepika’, yes…that’s her name, my first love. Believe me!..She was not my ‘only’ love…. she was my ‘first’ love.’ I kept saying this to myself.
After twenty-two years of my acquaintance, eighteen years of friendship, fourteen years of one sided love and six years as strangers, we met again. She was wearing white sari. She was more beautiful than I had ever imagined her in my dreams. I could still feel her eyes were searching for me. Now I kept on repeating ‘She was now a married woman’. But I couldn’t control my heart beats.
“Hi…. long time…, I can’t believe that we are meeting again.” I still had to control my eagerness to talk to her.
“Yeh…after really long time.” She sighed. “So, you went for post graduate studies.”
“Yes…my studies were over three year back. Now, I had been working. How have you been?”
“Great!! I had been working with ‘Airtel’ for past two years. Its nice to meet you, old pal. Do you remember we always used to have a blast when we were kids?”
“I remember everything. We were the best friends until I acted stupidly. You know in happens.”
“I don’t think it was stupid. It was just how you felt at that point. OK!..Forget about it..So any plans for marriage or are you a married man??”
“Partially true, I came home to tell my parents about ‘Trisha’. She was my fellow mate in the college. We share an amazing chemistry. And then we realized that we both loved each other. Now soon we will be getting married. What about you? How has been your married life? Any kids?”
“Actually, marrying ‘Ronit’ was not a good decision. We were not meant for each other. Within a year, we got divorced. There were very difficult days that followed. You know when ‘Love-marriage’ fails in India especially in a small town like ours, its really tough to fight with the image of a convict who got the punishment of what he or she deserves according to the society. But now everything is fine. I am enjoying my job and independent life.”
She was busy in meeting other people. My mind was blank for a while but suddenly thousands of emotions splurged into my mind. First, Happy - She finally got divorced. Yippee!! Sad- She was sad and lonely. Devil- You finally got your chance. She was single, and you are a successful bachelor. Angel- What about Trisha? She has been waiting for you.

As they say, Love was illusion, power, stupidity or anything one could ever imagine. It could be both selfish as well as selfless. I could not resist myself with the forces that attracted me towards 'Deepika' to surrender myself. And I could only feel sorry for ‘Trisha’. I could live ‘happily ever after with Trisha’ but I don’t want that ‘happy’ life.
I went to Deepika, “Deepika!...I had to say something to you…it’s important. I can do anything for you but please for once….”
Deepika interrupted, “Can I ask you for a favor as a friend? I would appreciate if we remain friends. All my life, I went for the things that I want and never cared for others. And still, my beliefs are not changed. I am fighting with the world for an independent and respectful life. Now I want to be a good daughter, good employee, good friend and a good person. Please don’t take my dignity by asking to follow my heart. I believe, I answered for your every unasked question.”
And she was gone.
My mother and I arrived at ‘Trisha’s home’ to talk about our marriage: Our love marriage. I was still debating with myself on definition for love.

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

I am thinking..what to think?

It is a general apothegm; Simple questions have complex answers and complex questions have simple answers. My actual question here is 'do we actually think?" The answer to my question is, we generally think what we are made to think. It can be done by our books, family atmosphere, society around us, newspapers TV channels and even all the sources of entertainment, right from cinema to soccer.

The three main pillars of thinking are rational mind, discussion and questioning. All the three are inter related to each other. Now let us discuss all of them one by one.

1. A Rational Mind
First, we generally associate ourselves with prejudices and dogmas very easiuly. For e.g.. we follow our religion and admire it. It is not because we have analyzed with substantial facts, but as we are born in it, we have prejudices and affliction for it.
Second, experience of others; any revered person can be a hindrance to experiment and formulate our own theories. A common example is, a man who has lost all his money in business will try to convince his son that business is bad.
And third, the fear of failure has been so much exaggerated in our society, that we are afraid to think of our own. Why else do you think that most successful business magnets, who were college dropouts themselves - Dhirubhai Ambani, Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Michael Dell etc. are employing the best minds from Universities. Because they have come off all prejudices, dogmas, and fear of failure. They have experimented and written their own rules.

2. Discussion
There is no point in any discussion if the first requisite condition of rational thinking is not satisfied.We generally do not have healthy discussions because either we get trapped into the never ending debate or we popped out some points that have already been presented before. That is because we have the habit of taking secondary pleasure of thinking without actually thinking. But in reality, we are just refreshing the thoughts which have intentionally rooted in our minds; all thanks to the society and the media.

3. Questioning
When we say questioning, this is actually a prohibited part of thinking. As George Bernard Shaw once said, "All greatest truth were once blasphemous." If we question the authorities then we might be called traitors. But, questioning does complete our process of thinking. The irony lies in, if we question the authorities about their working in a throng, we can bring justice to Jessica Lal's and Ruchika's murder case. But if I am alone then I can be either Jessica, Ruchika or Safdar Hashmi. We have two choices:

1. Be ignorant, think within the frequency allotted by the authorities and take vicarious pleasure

2. Fight with the ignorance, but then find wisdom and struggle to find the satisfaction.

This may be a case of Simple question with difficult answers. I myself am in a dilemma of choosing the road...

Till Next then

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Confusing Indian elections.

I find these elections confusing. I completely support all the NGO’s that are making great efforts to et everyone to vote, and striving to provide details of the candidates at a click of an sms request on your cell phone.
But what do the parties stand for ? The platform for everyone seems to be why the other party was not the right candidate. The electioneering seems to be completely negative. Putting down the opposing candidate. Why I should not vote for the other Candidate, not why I should vote for you ?
Why should I vote for you ?

Saturday, March 10, 2012

My Ideal World.


A world without suffering.

A world without pain.

A world without guilt.

A world without war.

A world without hunger.

This would be my ideal world.

A world without greed.

A world without selfishness.

A world without fear.

A world without hate.

A world without strife.

This would be my ideal world.

A world without crime.

A world without tears.

A world without sorrow.

A world without disappointment.

A world without sickness.

A world without prejudice.

This would be my ideal world.

A world without jealousy.

A world without divorce.

A world without lust.

A world without poverty.

A world without unforgiveness.

This would be my ideal world.

A world without famine.

A world without drought.

A world without conflict.

A world without division.

A world without disasters.

This would be my ideal world.

A world with peace.

A world with love.

A world with joy.

A world with laughter.

A world with honesty.

A world with acceptance.

A world with forgiveness.

This would be my ideal world.

Till Next then


Friday, March 2, 2012

Whispered into the Wind.

Whispered into the wind
every unspoken word
of love
that my own ears
yearn to catch.
Every moment
that floats
that I yearn to hold,
to memorize,
to imprint,
so I do not forget

Can I not hold
even one fleeting moment
So that when sleep escapes
into the storm of night
I don’t have to yearn
to search
in sheer panic?
For that
which I cannot see
cannot hear
cannot touch
but that
which surrounds me ?!?

Can I not?

Till Next then

Friday, February 10, 2012

Did you hear the Whisper?

Did you hear the whisper
that floated by,
that you thought
was your mind
playing games
as usual?
as you were
by the noise
inside your head,
did you hear the whisper?
That you tried to catch
but wafted away
even before you could listen?
Did you hear the whisper
like a gentle song
in a distant land
trying to come through
in the roaring traffic
of everyday existence
Did you hear the whisper?

If only I could. Or did I...

Till next then

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Just am.


without questions

about existence

accepting that I

just am.

But now

I learn every moment

who I am not

before I know

who I am.

And then, simply

that I am not,

we die

as we are born.


Till Next then


Monday, February 6, 2012

Attention Seeking...

We spend our lives trying to get attention and loving it. Getting attention is what provokes people, creates relationships and also destroys relationships. At some levels the ego is propelled to do greater things while it seeks attention. But at other levels, for so many of us attention seeking becomes an obsession. Therefore self-destructive. You can’t spend your life seeking affirmation through other people’s eyes. More often than not this leads to a loss of self-worth with all its associated problems.

I spent many years of my life as a child in wonderful adventures, but also in “Vanity” about myself. I often look back at my life and wonder how many beautiful relationships I missed out on, how many great adventures I did not give myself to, because of my own vanity or the need to seek attention.

But better late than never, I am on a different path now as I realize that the greatest adventure of all, the greatest potential relationships of all, the greatest love of all, lies in what’s given. Not in what is received.
Not because of some great “altruistic” or “selfless” illusion of myself. But because the greatest adventure of all lies in seeing yourself not as an individual drop, but as the ocean. To lose my sense of individuality. To lose that which is “Abhimanyu Manna” the individual allows me to lose “me.” I am not saying that I am there yet. My ego still carries too many remanents of the past. Past desires, past aspiratons and past insecurities. But I’ve made a start.

Everyday, for a part of the day I argue against my own ego to remind myself of the greatest illusion of all.

My individuality.


Till next then.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

A Stray thought.

When was the last time a lion asked of another
"so what’s he doing these days?"
doing what lions do I guess,
being a lion.
So what r u doing these days, Abhimanyu?
doing what human beings do I guess
being human
and destroying the planet
by eating more than the average human!..
for in the scheme of things.

Does an ant see itself as an individual
with an individual consciousness?
Or a collective?
And as I walk the streets
everyone trying as hard as they are,
myself included,
to express their individuality,
to know they exist,
conflicted as we are
by our need to be a part
and apart both
from the collective,
do ants need to do the same thing?
Whats going on in their mind
or wherever their consciousness
or their imagination exists?
Do they merely see, imagine
only the collective?
Or like us
the collective
through the individual?

And do we even enter
their consciousness
except as creatures
that trundle around
without purpose
between Big Bazaars
and the little cafe’
for a cup of coffee
and looking down
from a galaxy far far away
at this tiny speck of dust
called earth;
an ant,
a human,
one crushed
beneath the others feet
has no significance
other than
the breathing of the universe
between creation and destruction?

I wonder..!

Till Next then

Thursday, February 2, 2012


I ran from the noise
looking for silence
and in my solitude,
I heard a single scream
that came from
inside my head;
I was the one
the loudest,
trying to be heard
above everyone else
like a child
screaming for attention
in a world
where a billion voices
were doing the same.
I was.
I am.
Still am.

Till next then.

Monday, January 30, 2012

A Teacher Answers…

The dinner guests were sitting around the table discussing life.
One man, a CEO, decided to explain the problem with 'education'. He argued, “What’s a kid going to learn
from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a 'teacher'?”
To stress his point he said to another guest; “You’re a teacher, Bonnie. Be honest. What do you make?”
Bonnie, who had a reputation for honesty and frankness replied,
“You want to know what I make?”
(She paused for a second, then began…)
“Well, I make kids work harder than they ever thought they could.
I make a C+ feel like the Medal of Honor.
I make kids sit through 45 minutes of class time when their
parents can’t make them sit for 5 without an I Pod,
Play Station or movie rental.
You want to know what I make?
(She paused again and looked
at each and every person at the table)
I make kids wonder.
I make them question.
I make them apologize and mean it.
I make them have respect and take responsibility for their actions.
I teach them how to write and then I make them write. Keyboarding isn’t everything.
I make them read, read, read.
I make them show all their work in math. They use their God
given brain, not the man-made calculator.
I make my students from the villages learn everything
they need to know about English while preserving their
unique cultural identity.
I make my classroom a place where all my students feel safe.
I make my students stand, placing their hand over their heart to
say the ‘Pledge of Loyalty’ to their Flag and their Nation.
Finally, I make them understand that if they use the gifts they
were given, work hard, and follow their hearts, they can succeed in life.
( Bonnie paused one last time and then continued.)
Then, when people try to judge me by what I make, with me knowing money isn’t everything, I can hold my head up high and pay no attention because they are ignorant. You want to know what I make?
I MAKE A DIFFERENCE. What do you make Mr. CEO?”
His jaw dropped; he went silent.
Even all your personal teachers like mothers, fathers, brothers,
sisters, coaches and your spiritual leaders/teachers.
A profound answer!!!

Till Next then

(P.S.: Dedicated to all the teachers/professors that made me what I am today.)
---Inspired from a poem by Taylor Mali.

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Why was I born?

I looked for my true calling
I looked for my true purpose
What I am supposed to do on the planet
Why was I born ?
And I asked the question deep inside me
Beyond logic, beyond thought, deep in the bowels
Of the space where I connect to the Universe
Where I can be thrown into the raging storm of ‘not knowing’
And the answer hit me in an immense tidal wave of understanding
“You are your own purpose
Nothing more, and nothing less
A bundle of purpose and karma
All existing within itself
And the only thing holding it back
Is the separation created by
Words like ‘I’ and ‘my’ and ‘me’.”

Till Next then

Thursday, January 26, 2012

The Idea that is India…

In my room, all alone, thinking about my country and my people. The people of India. It’s Republic Day today.
The people of India ?
Is there another country on this planet with people as diverse as ours ? And while we constantly speak and complain about differences and conflicts, today must be a day to celebrate that diversity. The fact that despite the diversity we have clung to one nation even though everything threatens to tear us apart everyday.
Why? Because India is more than a country. It is an Idea. An Idea that was born as a reaction to being colonized, to being enslaved by colonial power for centuries. As long as the Idea survives, India survives. The day we let go of that idea, we might as well let go of India.
Happy Republic Day people…
Till Next then

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

I am that.

I am
nothing more
but nothing less.
I am not
who you think I am
I am not
who I think I am.
I am
all that is
and all that is not.
I am
neither defined
nor definable
neither finite
nor infinite.
I am
That was never born
or ever died.
I am
that has no word
to describe.
That I am.
I just
Till next then

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

The Story Teller

In my previous life I was a story teller.
Dragging myself from village to village,
where people would throw me some coins
to weave fantasy around their mundane lives
At my will
I would make them cry
and laugh.
Children rolled over and clapped with joy
as my characters
faced the most absurd plots I could weave
Except him,
who would neither laugh
nor shed a tear,
as he stood there
staring at me.
Would you like to hear a story ? I asked him.
”Not unless it is the story of all stories,” he said
And wherever I went he would be there
watching and listening,
”Can u tell me the story of all stories ?”
How could there be one story that defined all stories ?
and if there were
what value would I have ?
if there be just one story to tell ?
”You are of no value to me,” he said
”Unless you can tell me the story of all stories”
And he walked away
never looking back
Silly man,
How could I make a living
If I told the same story
again and again ?
But I died.
Never being able to tell another story
Have you ever died of thirst
in the presence of a glass of water
that you cannot see?
And into this life
He came again.
He took my hand
and showed me the ocean
and asked me to see,
and to observe
For the story of all stories was there,
a story that had no end
and no beginning.
Each rising swell
a new Plot that arose from the ocean
and then merged back
millions arising
and immediately going back to the source
The Source
The Story of all Stories
Till next then

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Color, Life & People…

Why do we still see in color?
When color came to film, it was a thrilling moment. We celebrated the richness of the colors and they’ve only sharpened over the years. Today our images are even more alive, our colors more vibrant.
Yet, while we celebrate color in the digital world, why don’t we do the same in the real world?  Why do we still stop there?  Why do we build so many differences – race, ethnicity, religion, class?  Why?
As one who’s traveled widely, well, almost, it’s become quite apparent that people are people, no matter what color – pink, purple, green even! It’s become apparent that our frustrations, worries, concerns, fears are so universal.  That is why great art, literature, and music sees no divide.  Because its message is of human emotion.
We are creatures who oddly think of others before ourselves many times.  We are inclined to bend to the wishes of family and dear friends, even if they are against our deepest desires.  We gravitate towards what we are told us “right.”  But what is “right?”  Is it my “right”?  Is it your “right”?  Who came up with “right”?
And in the mad cacophony of voices in our head, we forget our own.  What if we do not see the differences?  What if we do not see color, race, ethnicity, religion, or class?  Should we, because the world does as well?  Should we, because our families do as well?  Should we, because it is easier that way – to drive in the lane that you’re currently taking?
The questions seem endless.  And yet, the answer repeatedly seems to be the same — no.
But, we live only for a few moments, only a few years on this planet, only a short lapse in the grander scheme.  Why not please ourselves?  Why not be guided by unfiltered passion?  Why not go blind, using only what we feel?  Why not be absolutely true to our deepest wishes?
Because it is difficult?
But nothing is difficult.  As I’m told repeatedly, life is simple.
People complicate it.
Till next then…

Friday, January 20, 2012


I love the winters. I love the way ice cream tastes in he cold. I love the winters for its glamour. People wear all kinds of colors. Everyone likes to look good. Everyone looks jolly. The mood feels light. The mind feels good. The winters bring out the quilts. And what is better than a chilly night outside and a warm quilt inside, some pop corn and a good movie? I love the winters.
The sleeping hours get stretched. And the people, they always, somehow, don’t smell as horrid as during the summers. The woolens have their distinctive odor, that retro-kinda odor. All kinds of fashion are acceptable during this season. You wear whatever you like without anyone eyeing at you as if you were a fashion disaster, not that it matters anyway.
And the food. Hot food is always welcome. Suddenly you start liking tea. The markets get flooded with all kinds of veggies, fresh, exotic. One can derive way more pleasure cooking now, than during the summers.
But then, every morning we wake up to news of more people dying of the cold in certain regions of the nation. On one hand, where winter mornings always manage to make you feel ecstatic, on the other, these kinda news sinks your heart. How can the exact same thing be so blissful to some, and live-threatening to another? Nature has his own deadly sense of humor, a practical joke. Its disheartening. Some would say, “What can I do if some are poor?”
True. You, probably can not do much. But then there are ways in which you can contribute your bit to the society. It is curious how only 10% actually do something for the society, without any material incentives. Also, only another 10% have absolutely no heart to do anything for the society. Now, what about the rest 80? They are like me. In the midst. Willing to do their bit. But directionless. If only happiness could be exchanged through Bluetooth.Or say telepathy. The earth would have been a much happier place. If only...
Till Next then..

Wednesday, January 18, 2012


Aimless wandering. No particular destination. No aims. No goals. Living and existing in the moment. No care for the past nor for the future. All heart. Does not use the head.
What a liberated way to live..!
So why was it always an accusation against me?
Is being myself, wrong in any way?
And yet, I am happiest, most creative and best at what I do
when I am aimless,
Awara hoon..
Does anyone remember the words of that song?
It has left me humming..
Till next then.

Monday, January 16, 2012

The Alien and me.

Suddenly my view of myself and the universe, would, in that instant be changed, re-evaluated, all the questions I asked from that moment on would be different. Context would be different,
If I came across an Alien today.
What would I say if there were words. Would I shake hands if there were hands ? Or indeed if there was form ? Or would I ignore the Alien as a mere figment of my imagination. And what is wrong with a mere figment of my imagination ? What did I impose upon myself that a figment of of my imagination could never be a figment, perhaps the most significant figment of my existence.
Why have I allowed that being without form, that being that dreams, that being that imagines, that being that continually sees life as play. Why have I allowed that being to turn into an Alien living in a cage of suppression. Knocking on my door from inside my mind.
As the knocking gets louder, pushing against the mundanity of habittuality that takes over as existence, it’s time to let the Alien out. For there is always an alien sitting inside us that is knocking at the doors of our mind with figments of imagination – but over the years we start ignoring those figments as impractical madness.
What is practical anyway ? Or should I say, what is more practical, or, better still, real? Me? Or the alien within me?

Saturday, January 14, 2012

Still Life marches on.

As I look back at my life, I have been accused of being impractical (I am), a dreamer (I am) a wanderer (completely), the famous comment ‘you treat life like it was just play’ – yes I do. ‘Act your age’ – I can remember forever. People have said I have an over active imagination (yes, completely), that I should be more serious about life (I agree, but I do not know really know what they mean). The point I have been making is that while I have always accepted these accusations, I have lived under the burden of guilt of all these accusations. I have consistently tried to change them, but neither have I been able to change myself, nor have I been able to be free of considering myself somewhat an irresponsible human being…
…par…log toh kahenge hi…just because people say this is right and that is wrong, and if I will change my life because of their perceptions, I think I will lose myself, reach nowhere. So then I should try to enjoy what I am, sometimes irresponsible, confined to solitary, doing the things i want and not bothering.
So at the end of the day who cares? Why …we come alone, go alone, being a mere visitor to this planet, its perfectly all right to be so. Sometimes near and dear ones worry and their worry actually affects, but at the end of the day do they know what's going on with your being? I really do not think so man!
Till next then..!

Thursday, January 12, 2012

90% of our Brain is devoted to?

Gossiping !All of us have heard about scientists saying we use only 10% of our brains. So what is the other 90% doing ? Some say it is to connect with our universal and spiritual selves. Others say it’s all about the subconscious problem solving part of the brain.
But the theory I like the most is that 90% of our brain is reserved for an art that in our hurried daily lives we are fast loosing. The art of Gossip.
Apparently we need to gossip to come to terms with the pressures of everyday social interaction. We need to gossip, to put it crudely, to stop killing each other. And a sense of humor is so important to the Art of Gossip. In eastern societies there is an unsaid acceptance of the Gossip culture. Almost an addiction. For how would they survive some of the really harsh conditions with any form of dignity without a bit of Gossip and a sense of humor ?
For those that know and live in North India here are the keywords :
“Kya kar rahe ho aaj sham ko ?”, “Chal aaja, yaar, kuch gup-shup marenge’
“Aaj mehfil kahan hai ?”

Each one an invitation to idle gossip. Idle and free flowing being the key words. To ease out the tensions and pressure of everyday life, and to ease yourself back into harmony with the community, and therefore with yourself and . We have seen it all over, with the men around the Hookah in the middle east. The men gathered drinking in Greece.
In England the community gathering together at the pub.
The ability to gossip is the ability to indulge in a sense of humor. We loose that and we are lost. And I would like to believe that is true. That 90% of our brains are available for a wonderful sense of humor.
But as we physically move away from our roots, as we become more and more involved with the pressures of work, as families become smaller and smaller, and as TV and computers and the internet takes away time from the ultimate leisure activity that 90% of our brains are designed for – Gossip – what is happening to us as social beings ?
As we are finding ourselves more and more isolated, are we becoming more and more intolerant of each other ? Of each other’s points of view ? Are we loosing our identity as assimilated social beings ?
And is it possible that the rise of blogging and chat rooms are the new alternate forms of the ‘Gossip Society ? Is it the new Mehfil? Is it the 90% brain that is driving us there ?
However, surely being together face to face and with the physical intimacy that a warm gossip room brings, also brings with it a sense of responsibility. It is the adult form of play that children and the young of all animal kingdom do – play act war games and battle games and social games. It’s the adult form of what little girls do when they play with dolls and dolls houses.
The adult form is the Gossip room. the Mehfil.
So my question is that, is the anonymity of the blog and the chat room taking away the responsibility that being face to face brings? Are we playing out the adult social games as they were meant to be, or are we indulging in something half baked and therefore possibly dangerous here.
Dangerous? Not if we accept that there is a nature of Gossip in what we are doing. So lets bring back a sense of humour, shall we?
Or 90% of our brains will be destructive instead of constructive and harmonizing.
Till Next then.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

The Art of doing Nothing.

Work, work, work. Play hard. Take a holiday. Go out. Have you seen the latest ? And yet …. I crave to walk the mountains, not alone, but in solitude, allowing my mind to breathe, to listen to the quite whispers going on between me and my mind. Between my conscious and subconscious. Every day to get to know myself again, to say a quite hello to myself, and give myself a gentle hug. And seemingly to do nothing. Nothing except just be…..
…. for if not, I am no longer active. I fool myself into thinking that the flurry of activity is real. That it gives my presence on this planet worth
It is an illusion.
For it is just a flurry of reactivity.. It’s like my mind is leaving my heart behind.
Often we believe that what happens is so directly related to what we do. Our actions.
That is just our Ego. For often our actions are mere reactions. Reactions that actually impede what we set out to achieve. To do.
Sometimes, it is good to sit back and believe. Just believe. Knowing that sometimes it is not merely in the doing, but also in the believing.
Till Next then.

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Time for a Free Hug…!!

A couple of days ago, I was prepared to blog angrily about something that was sticking in my craw, namely the accusations of bias and expectations that pop into my life almost daily. They make any day terribly frustrating, especially at a time of high tension.
& then I got a free hug -- actually two of them -- and the world seemed a little better.
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Feeling depressed and lonely after numerous personal difficulties, Australian Juan Mann was deeply touched by a random hug from a stranger at a party. What began as one person giving hugs in a Sydney mall eventually evolved into a worldwide social movement of individuals offering hugs to strangers in public places.
The "Free Hug" movement began with one man in Sydney, Australia, who decided to cure a case of the blues by going to a mall with a hand-lettered "Free Hugs" sign. His only motive was to spread a little cheer with a universal human gesture of kindness (In fact, he goes by a pseudonym -- Juan Mann -- to avoid personalizing the movement.) The idea took off in Australia, and eventually around the world, thanks in part to a music video by the band Sick Puppies that featured inspiring footage of Mann at work. (The video, which you can watch to the left, has been viewed 71 million times and counting.)
Sometimes, a hug is all that we need. The Free Hugs Campaign is a real life controversial story of Juan Mann, a man whose sole mission was simply to reach out and hug a stranger. He merely wanted to bring some joy into a fellow humans life.
In an age where human contact rarely seems to occur, this Sydney, Australian man started a virtual revolution. Visit YouTube to watch this amazing video and see how the public was inspired and rallied around Juan when the police decided to ban hugs.
“It’s a way to make people smile,” Mann said.
“For every person who gets a hug, you see five walk past with a smile on their face.”
I never realized how far a hug could go! The whole free hugs thing completely make anyone’s day. Hugging complete strangers really does break the barriers. And it really makes you a lot less paranoid when in a group of people you don't know.
And I love this. I was inspired. From today onwards…this entire year… Its FREE HUGS YEAR for me…
FREE HUGS to each & every one who needs it
FREE HUGS for all who believe in it…
New Fact from today: We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.
Hugs will make you healthier, younger, thinner, more relaxed, live longer, fight depression and make you age slower.
You should try it… Because even if someone isn’t hugging you, they’re walking by… feeling good ;)
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Till Next..